


I have no more space in my heart for disappointments.
I'm so tired but I have to get to super-uber-far-away Catholic JC tomorrow morning.
Fuck people who tell me what to do, where to go. I've had bloody enough.
All you mindless and insensitive morons, must I spell it out for you that I'm already very demoralised and upset?
When I saw the letter from CJC and saw the list of activities till 4 Feb, I felt slightly nauseous and faint.
I felt an even sharper pang of hurt when I saw that the local universities don't give a shit about Humanities subjects.
Because I want to do H2 Literature.
So badly.
But I would only be wasting my time on a subject that can't allow me to pursue a relevant degree and in future, a job. Wouldn't I?
I feel like just throwing in the towel, raise my hands in the air, in surrender. I'm really exhausted.
But I can't pretend and I can't procrastinate.
Which is what I really, really hate.
I hate even more that I've to see you in CJC, you fucking idiot.
I don't want to argue but you keep talking on and on and you haven't the slightest clue the impact of the blow of disappointment inside of me.
Why do I have to work when I'm sick?
Why does someone with the exact same score as me, can get into the school I want? And that someone didn't even put this school as his/her first choice.
Why do I have to be so pathetic? Otherwise, all this crap would not have even begun.
Why don't I understand you and vice versa?
